The Faceless Snowman

Meet Melvin, the snow buddy that I built last Friday. He looks a bit sloppy, but he's a happy dude and made with lots of love. I have always liked building snowmen. While I'm not crazy about having to roll and haul the big snow balls, I enjoy giving my snow buddies their distinct faces. Once Melvin's head and body was created, I gave him some flare with a carrot, a couple of wine stoppers and some gum balls. I thought EB would be ecstatic with the end product, so imagine my confusion when she had the opposite response.

EB: “Can we make a mean snowman instead?”
Me: “Melvin is not mean; he's a really nice snowman.”
EB: “I don’t want to build a nice snowman. I want a monster snowman.”

I was perplexed-- K and I make a point of only letting her watch feel-good shows – Barney, Dora, Kai-Lan—so where does this child get her fixation on creating an evil snowman? After some prodding, EB blurted out: “I don’t want the nice snowman to melt. Only mean snowman can melt.”


Ahh; now it made sense. EB is at an age where she is grappling with the concept of justice, in an idyllic sort of way. That is, bad things should only happen to bad people and nice people should be spared from tragic events. If only, little girl.

I tried explained to her that sometimes, bad things happen to nice people. Which inevitably led to multiple “whys.” Which left me even more confounded, because the truth is, I’m still really not sure myself. Is it because world events are truly random? Is it God’s will? How do you explain to a four-year old that sometimes, really nasty things happen to the nicest people, and there is not one thing anyone can do about it? If anyone has any suggestions, let me know.

The next morning, Melvin had transformed into a faceless dude. Apparently, EB had removed every single one of his facial parts – if he can’t be a mean snowman, he can at least be faceless.

Then the afternoon came, and Melvin melted off into a pool of nothingness. How sad. But at least EB had wiped the smile off his face before he met his inevitable demise.