Spelling Beast

A few years back, I was visiting my parents and was sitting around the living room when I noticed a video tape sitting on top of their television set. The homemade label said "THE BREAST," in big, bold, capital letters.

What the???...

I’d never heard of any movie called “The Breast.” I first thought that maybe it was a bad 1970's sci-fi/horror movie with marauding body parts. Or, could it be a medical documentary on the female part? Or could it be…Oh. My. God.…Could it possibly be that my parents had left a porno movie lying around in the living room? I told my brother, and the idea made us giggle like schoolgirls.

Day after day, it sat out on top of the TV, taunting us. It was fun speculating for awhile, but finally I could stand it no longer; it was time to confront Dad.

“Umm…Dad. What’s this video?”

“Oh, that. I recorded it a few months back. Thought you two may like to watch it.”

“Uhh..Okay…what’s it about?”

“Some movie about a giant squid. Lots of action.”

“Um. Dad. It says ‘The BREAST’ on it.”

“Oh...really? Ha..ha...I meant ‘The BEAST.’ Must’ve added an ‘r’ by accident.” Dad shrugged, chuckled to himself, and that was that. Mystery solved.

Just a few days ago, my brother was visiting them and found the same tape in their movie collection. Rather than change the tag, Dad decided to scribble out the "R" with a marker..but the way he did it, it just accentuates the "R" even more. See exhibit below.

The BREAST lives on.